Annoying Orange – Fart Step (transcript)
Narrator: In 2010, a one-pan army named Skrillet took the music world by storm, with a new breed of infectious music pop, known simply as “dumbstep”.
(dubstep music plays)
Narrator: But by 2015, the world was turning a deaf ear to this cast iron crusader. Creatively adrift, and increasingly irrelevant, Skrillet was going out of the pan into the fire. Meanwhile, rumors swirled a crazy parody artist, working in secret for nearly a half decade trying to create the perfect dubstep spoof. Could it be this upstart holds the key to reviving an entire genre, or is it just a lot of hot air? Find out, as we go behind the behind of this musical behind.
Orange: Stooop! (groans) Still doesn’t sound right.
Midget Apple: It’s fine! We’ll just add some reverb.
Midget Apple: (groans) Pick up the headphones.
Orange: I can’t hear you!
Midget Apple: The headphones! Pick up the–
Orange: No, it’s not that. I just ignore you when you say things I don’t agree with.
Midget Apple: (grumbles loudly)
Orange: Nope, there’s no two ways about it. We’re gonna have to re-record! (drinks a bottle of bean smoothie and then throws it away)
Midget Apple: Ugh! Times like this I’m glad I don’t have a nose!
Orange: Whoa-ho-ho-ho-ho! (stomach growls) Get the mike, buddy. I’m ready to lay it down!
Midget Apple: Dude, take it to the recording booth!
Orange: I would if somebody would hurry up!
Pear: Well, this is awkward.
Orange: No time to talk! (gets into the recording booth) Genius outwork! Gah, Pear, light a match!
Pear: It was like that when I got there!
Orange: Oh, that’s such a load of–
Midget Apple: Everybody quiet! We’re rolling!
(recording session. Orange was heard farting from the booth)
Midget Apple: And… cut!
Orange: Did you get that?
Skrillet: Oh, yeah! You got it, and I want more of it!
Midget Apple: Whoa! It’s Skrillet!
Orange: Dude! We’ve hated you since… forever!
Skrillet: My man, I appreciate that. But you know, I ain’t hip a compliments or nothing.
Orange: I promise, that will not be a problem.
Midget Apple: So… what are you doing here?
Skrillet: Man, I’m a pan! Can a pan just hang out in the kitchen? That’s what we do.
Orange: He’s got you there, Midget Apple.
Midget Apple: Yugh! Come on, Orange. It’s obvious he’s only here to steal our spoof! Look, he even brought a lawyer!
(Franklin L. Spud reappears)
Franklin L. Spud: Uh yeah, uh… did uh, somebody say lawyer?
Skrillet: Yo, I told you to wait in the car! Yo, but seriously though, I don’t even know what he’s talking about.
Orange: Me neither. This spoof was my idea. It’s not a collaboration.
Midget Apple: Oh, you are such a control freak!
Franklin L. Spud: Pardon me, gentle-fruits, but the only order of this spoof is my client.
Midget Apple and Orange: Whaaat???
Franklin L. Spud: Hardly surprising, but Mr. Skrillet is the only one who funded your kickstarter.
Midget Apple: Gaaah! I told you not to make own-it-all-forever one of the options!
Orange: Know this. You may take our master tapes, but you’ll never take our freedoooom!
Franklin L. Spud: No-no-no, it covers freedom too.
Orange: Yeesh. You guys are worse than a multi-channel network.
Skrillet: Word! Now let’s see what else he has been working on. I mean dumbstep is constantly evolving, and we all gotta be out there on the cutting-edge, deal me?
Orange: Better check yourself or you wreck yourself! Our kitchen crew has got more step to the stair master. Bring it down, Little Apple!
Midget Apple: Take it to the next level, yooo!
Orange: (long farts, imitates record scratching, grunts and farts constantly)
Franklin L. Spud and Pear: Ahawwww!
Skrillet: Yay-step? Why didn’t I think of that?
Grandpa Lemon: Dagnabbit, what’s with all the racket? Can an old lemon get a moment’s– (snores in tune, then wakes up) Whoa, what? Oh, that was so loud I woke myself up. Oh, that never happened– (snores in tune again)
Skrillet: Yeaaah. Haha!
Orange: That’s nothing. Wait till you hear… Squash-step!
(Franklin L. Spud gets squashed)
Skrillet: Hey, great finish, man. You guys ruuule!
Orange: But wait, there’s more!
Skrillet: Yo, how could this get any better?
Orange: Duh. You still haven’t heard… shrug-step!
Skrillet: (stares blankly, then gets hit by Midget Apple’s monster truck)
Midget Apple: Uh-oh. Uh, my bad, guys. My bad.
Orange: Seriously, dude. You took that one a “step” too far! (all laugh)
(in the end, Grapefruit is seen wearing a bathrobe, a shower cap, and holding a rubber ducky)
Grapefruit: What? You guys don’t like dubstep? (sighs) Forget this. I’ll be in my office. (opens the recording booth) Gah! Light a match, Pear!
– Midget Apple
– Grandpa Lemon
– Franklin L. Spud
– Squash (recurring)